Second Time Around

Introduction

I guess “Second Time Around” has a couple of meanings in this post. It’s been about 3 years since I’ve updated this page in any significant way. To be honest, I left it for dead and completely forgot it existed. When my students asked if I had a “blog”, I thought they found the main page. They most likely meant this page because some of them found the Instagram associated with this blog. Then again, perhaps they just wanted to troll me a bit with their questions. Who knows with that bunch?

Rest assured that I didn’t reboot this page simply to talk about my high school students. Instead, I’m feeling inspired once again to get outside and share my experiences. Truth be told, this page probably wouldn’t have seen the light of day again if not for a series of coincidences. Of course, that can be said about much of my life.

Around the time that I abandoned this page, I started a journal. The main purpose of that journal was to highlight the good, assess the previous 3 or so years where depression took over for most of that time, and attempt to reverse the damage caused by that depression. I completed that journal and started a new on this year. I found that I was having difficulty keeping the new journal updated.

So, I searched for a “daily journal prompt” web page. I found one that finally delivered on that promise. Instead of using it to update my paper journal (which sits in my school bag, untouched again for another week), I decided to use it to inspire me to keep this page updated more regularly. Choose an outdoor adventure, I thought, and build your daily entry around that day’s theme. Since I’m on April break this week, what better time to test that theory?

The trick, then, as discussed with Chris about trying to reboot my abandoned YouTube page, is how do I stay inspired once I am back in school and no longer on break? I brainstormed a way to keep the YouTube page relevant by recording retro content on my new 2600 emulator because those games are short and I could generate a ton of content in just an hour of playing. This page, though, requires generally a commitment of at least an hour just for the hike alone. Oh well, cross that bridge (and most likely burn it) when we get there.

Journal Part 1 – “Second (Third, Fourth, Fifth, etc) Time Around – ‘The Stand'”

The theme of today is “Second Time Around” with a prompt of “Tell us about a book you can read again and again without getting bored — what is it that speaks to you?” Anyone who knows me knows that the only answer to this question is Stephen King’s “The Stand”. I first read the book as a teenager. At the time, I also read “It”, “Bag of Bones”, “Different Seasons”, and “Hearts in Atlantis”.

People assumed I was a Stephen King fan. In fact, I only liked those specific books by him. I enjoyed “Bag of Bones” so much, I unintentionally wrote an homage to it with my own book, “Siren Song”. My students, by the way, got me to admit to that book and “From Shadows”. What can I say? They’ve been instrumental in helping me in my journey back from depression. If any of you find this, know that and know that I am eternally grateful to you for your help during this time.

I reread “The Stand” again in my 20s, my 30s, and then listened to the audiobook twice over during my time as a custodian at Northfield Elementary School three years ago. Not once did the book ever bore me. And, so, I answered the first part of the question. What about the second part? What is it that speaks to me?

Journal Interlude #1 – “A Note About Hunter Biden”

Seeing as how politics encroached on every aspect of our lives, half of my potential reading audience just tuned out and started crafting an angry letter to the editor. For those of you who stayed, let me explain. Marc Maron recently interviewed Hunter and I listened to the interview during my “outdoor adventure” today. I put outdoor adventure in quotes because I simply walked around town with the dog and stopped at the post office to pick up a package.

To the point, during the interview Marc said something that resonated. Speaking of addiction, he said, “You don’t want to kill yourself, but you don’t care if you do.” I’m not an addict. That’s damning in and of itself, right? Like being a racist, once you have to defend yourself against addiction, you’ve already lost.

In any case, I made that exact statement more than once during my healing phase over the last few years. I realized that’s exactly what I was doing. I wasn’t consciously trying to kill myself, but the drinking, food, and other poor health habits could have done the job. There are still visits to my doctor open, so who knows? Maybe it eventually will. Sorry, that got dark. Let’s see if I can turn it around.

Journal – “Second (Third, Fourth, Fifth, etc) Time Around – What About ‘The Stand’ Speaks To Me?”

The book starts innocently enough. Frannie Goldsmith lives in scenic Ogunquit, Maine. She and her boyfriend break up. Stu Redman hangs out with his loser buddies at a gas station in Texas. Larry Underwood hits “high bottom” (more addiction talk) and comes crawling back to his childhood home. The characters in the book are more well rounded and I feel like I know them better than many of the people in my own life. King, in the foreword for the extended edition of the book, says, “Often I will receive mail from people asking how Fran and Stu are doing as if I get regular updates from them.” As a frustrated writer, the closest I came to that was my wife asking, “What happens next?” when reading an early copy of my manuscript.

A series of unfortunate events (a book series I also very much enjoy) leads to the ultimate showdown between good and evil and an unlikely hero who saves the day. That sentence feels like one of those “explain the plot of a book poorly” challenges that they have on social media all the time. If I’m being honest, the plot isn’t one of the reasons that I keep coming back to the book. It’s a typical religious allegory. Well, there’s got to be more to this book than the characters, right? Well, actually, uh, no. I’ve learned about myself that I can forgive weak dialogue and flimsy plot as long as the characters are strong.

As a teenager, I lived for the chaos of Trash, Flagg, and Harold. In my 20s, I latched onto the friendship between Tom and Nick. My 30s, with the aforementioned pending addiction issues and suicidal thoughts, Larry Underwood became my avatar in the apocalypse. Most recently, having lived through those (so far) addiction issues and suicidal thoughts, I longed for the “normalcy” of Frannie’s and Stu’s life in Colorado. Like I said, it just hits different each time.