Couch to 5K

Prologue

If you told me at the beginning of the year that I would be running 35 minutes a day, I’d have told you to have your head examined.  Biking daily?  Sure, I’ve been there.  Swimming daily?  Yep, I’ve done that, too.  That reminds me.  I really should get back to biking and swimming.

Journal

Aiden is our “do everything” kid.  He signs up for any extracurricular activity that the school and community provides.  Even if he doesn’t sign up for an activity, he still brings home the paper and tries to convince us that it’s something that interests him.  And so it was that he ended up signed up for “Boys on the Right Track”.

Perhaps I should explain.  Their school started an after school program called “Girls on the Run”.  It focuses on team building and self confidence in the context of training for a 5K race.  The boys in the school wondered why only the girls were allowed to have such a program.  Believe it or not, but there was some push back to even giving the boys their own program.

I don’t remember exactly what the argument was.  It was along the lines of “girls never get anything for themselves” or something like that.  Whatever the reason, it wasn’t persuasive enough.  The principal of the school put together the resources to start the program for the boys.  After seeing the results, perhaps the naysayers were on to something.  The boys didn’t perform nearly as well as the girls.  There were constant reports of misbehavior and rudeness.  The boys just didn’t enjoy the team building part of it.  They just wanted to compete and run.  But, the leaders stayed with it and the boys turned it around eventually.

How does all this lead to me running on an almost daily basis?  Well, Aiden needed a running buddy and Christine, in her infinite wisdom and kindness, chose me to be his buddy.  Now, that’s probably not fair and misguided.  It was the “Boys on the Right Track” program, after all.  So, it make sense that I would end up being his running buddy.  I should probably mention at this point that I have never run for recreation in my life.

In fact, I could probably count the number of times that I had run as an adult on two hands.  Luckily, the times I did run weren’t, as the old joke goes, to save my own life.  It’s simply something that wasn’t done.  It’s not that I was adverse to exercise.  I rode my bike often and started a daily swimming regiment at the local YMCA this past December.  I had just somehow convinced myself that running was a ridiculous endeavor and there’s no reason to run unless you are in one of those life threatening situations from the aforementioned joke.

There are even times that I took an almost superior view of those who ran.  Who the hell do they think they’re impressing?  I try not to get into that whole judging others for the things that they like, but for some reason this whole running deal just rubbed me the wrong way.  Especially marathoners, I really hated those guys.  Running 26 miles?  For what?  And why do you put bumper stickers on your car advertising it?  Just because some Greek guy supposedly did it thousands of years ago?  When I heard that they had to tape their nipples to prevent chafing and bleeding, that convinced me that there was no good reason to run a marathon.

Some of that changed when I learned that one of my best friends from high school trained and ran marathons.  It’s that old political trick of not caring about something until you know someone who is involved with that thing.  I still didn’t want to run, but I wasn’t actively opposed to the activity anymore.  In fact, he talked about coming into Boston for the race and I started to see running as a social activity.

I still had no desire to run, but I could understand why people ran.  It wasn’t until “Boys on the Right Track” had a practice 5K that “strongly encouraged” buddies to accompany their runners.  Still not interested in running, I decided to take the route of ignore it and hope it goes away.  It did not.  I literally tried to run a 5K from the couch.  Literally.  That is not an exaggeration.  I stood up from my couch, without stretching, and “ran” 5K.  In actuality, I ran about 5 to 10 minutes and then spent the rest of the time walking/limping, attempting to catch my breath, and wondering why my lower back hurt.  Sure, other things hurt, but they made sense.  Feet, ankles, knees, legs.  I thought that maybe the pain had gained sentience and was working its way through my body to paralyze or even kill me.

Shuffling like a zombie, I was the last one to cross the finish line.  I took so long that they gave up on even having a finish line and nearly everyone was in their post race high(?) and drinking water, taking pictures and selfies, and having a grand old time.  Thoroughly embarrassed and humiliated, I came home and took to Facebook to publicize my humiliation further.  The community of runners came to assist me.  One of my Facebook friends advised me to keep with the program and go back to the previous run if I was having trouble.  Another encouraged me to keep it up, too.  I explained to them that the “couch to 5K” was literal and that I would download the program and give it a try.

The “Boys on the Right Track” 5K at Greenfield Community College was about halfway through the program.  I was still in the walk/run cycle of the program, but I did finish the race.  I didn’t come in last.  I actually felt pretty good about myself and what I had been able to accomplish in only a month.  I could have quit the program after the 5K because, as old me would say, “What the hell are you trying to prove?”  But, as new me said when inquired if I was enjoyed running, “I started the program and feel like I need to see it through to the end.”

Now, 3 months later, I have worked my way through the 8 week program and just two weeks ago I ran every single day.  Vacation, work, and an especially rainy summer have disrupted that routine, but I did run on Monday of this week, yesterday, and plan to run again today.  I still wouldn’t say that I enjoy running, but I have found a podcast to listen to that makes it more bearable.

Epilogue

I started the year hating running.  I got to a point where I tolerated running for the sake of my kid.  I continued to run out of some misguided notion to “finish what I started”.  I now run because I guess it’s a thing that I do.  Next week I can start swimming in the morning.  I need a new stem/pedal for my bike and then who knows?  Maybe I will become one of those annoying triathlon guys that I used to hate so much.

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